How to Set Expectations & Create a Work Agreement
After more than 40 years placing nannies with families, one thing has become very clear:
the most successful nanny-family relationships are not necessarily the ones that start with the “perfect fit.” They are the ones built on clear expectations from the very beginning. And one of the best ways to create that clarity is with a written work agreement.
Why Work Agreements Matter
At the start of a new placement, everything often feels easy. Families and nannies are excited, flexible, and focused on making the relationship work. Conversations feel comfortable, and it is tempting to assume everyone is on the same page.
But as time goes on, questions naturally come up:
- What happens if the family travels?
- Are sick days paid?
- How are schedule changes handled?
- Are extra household duties included?
- What about guaranteed hours?
When these details are not discussed upfront, misunderstandings can happen — even between people with the best intentions.
A Real-Life Lesson
For instance, early in my career, I worked with a nanny who chose not to formalize a work agreement. The family was kind, the children were wonderful, and everyone felt confident the arrangement would work out smoothly. A few months later, the family planned a two-week vacation.
The nanny assumed she would still be paid because she had committed her availability to the family and turned down other work opportunities. The family assumed the opposite. Their response was simple: “We didn’t think we needed to pay since we’re away.”
What began as a positive placement slowly became strained — not because anyone behaved badly, but because expectations had never been clearly defined.
What Should Be Included in a Work Agreement?
A strong work agreement does not need to be complicated or intimidating. It simply needs to provide clarity for both sides. Some of the most important areas to cover include:
Schedule & Hours
- Regular weekly schedule
- Guaranteed hours
- Expectations around flexibility or overtime
Compensation
- Hourly or salaried pay
- Overtime structure
- Payroll and payment schedule
Time Off
- Paid vacation
- Sick days
- Holidays
- What happens when the family travels
Responsibilities
- Childcare expectations
- Household duties related to the children
- Driving or transportation responsibilities
Communication
- Preferred communication methods
- Daily updates or check-ins
- How concerns or schedule changes should be handled
How to Bring It Up Professionally
If a family has not mentioned a work agreement, it is perfectly appropriate for a nanny to bring it up professionally and calmly.
A simple approach might sound like this: “I’ve found that having a simple written agreement helps set clear expectations for both sides. I’d love to make sure we’re aligned on things like schedule, time off, and responsibilities.” This does not signal rigidity — it signals professionalism.
What Experienced Nannies Understand
The most successful and in-demand nannies understand something important:
- They do not skip this conversation.
- They do not assume details will work themselves out later.
- And they do not rely on “we’ll figure it out as we go.”
Experienced caregivers know that clear communication at the beginning creates stability and trust over time.
To sum it up, treat nanny-family relationships are built on trust, communication, and mutual respect. A written work agreement helps protect all three. When expectations are clear from day one, both families and nannies can focus less on confusion — and more on building a positive, lasting relationship together.