The start of the New Year always brings around the question of resolutions and improvements. We’ve pulled together a few of our tips you can start the New Year with Healthy Habits for your work and personal life.

You Can Only Change One Person – The fact is we only have control over one person: ourselves. When you realize that, you’ll start taking more control over your own needs without worrying about how that affects everyone else. For example, if you need to lose weight, but your spouse or family isn’t very supportive even though they could stand to lose a few pounds too, putting yourself first in this case will rub off on them – especially if you happen to be the cook in the family.

You Teach People How to Treat You – Dr. Phil is most famous for saying that if people are treating you poorly it may be because you’ve given them permission to do so via actions, if not words. Once you start treating yourself better, your friends and family might decide that they also deserve better. They may start treating themselves better as well as you better solely based on your attitude.

Communicate – The new year is a great opportunity to communicate what is working and not working in your work life and personal life. Ask to set up a meeting or annual review with your employers to go over the past year, suggestions for improvement – on both sides – and discuss the plan moving forward. How are things with family, friends and relationships? Take time to let others know how you’re feeling – good and bad – and how you can move forward for the new year.

Mirror the Behavior You Want to See – You might not learn about mirroring if you aren’t actively reading about self-help. But, as you learn more about yourself and how you want to be treated, you will learn how to act in such a way that demonstrates to others how you want them to behave. This works especially well with children.

Brighten Someone’s Day – When you study self-help techniques and how to build self-esteem in yourself, you’ll learn that an honest compliment can go a long way. As you feel more secure in yourself, you’ll find that you have more good things to say about others. As you compliment them, they will also feel better about themselves and a circle of positivity will begin.

Learn to Ask Questions the Right Way – Instead of trying to convince someone of a fact by debating them, learn to ask leading questions. Questions that make the person think about their answers deeply will work a lot better than making demands on them. As you read self-help books and practice self-help, you’ll learn the right techniques.

Set Boundaries – As you study self-help, you’ll learn more about healthy boundaries which will keep you from taking any of the other lessons you’ve learned too far in the wrong direction. Boundaries keep us from either being abused or being abusive to others. We realize that our rights end where someone else’s begins.

As you seek to improve yourself, and put to practice the things that you learn, you’ll find that your friends and family often follow your lead as long as you aren’t demanding of them. Instead of activity trying to recruit anyone into your new-found self-knowledge training, just be the example and they’ll come around all on their own.


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Setting boundaries for your children is one of the best ways to raise well rounded children. Finding the invisible line in keeping your children happy and at the same time teaching them where the rules are can be very hard to find. Yet, your success is likely to depend on just one thing: your ability to follow through. In many families, the problem lies in parents not following through with the rules, punishments or even rewards. Once this is put in place, though, significant changes are seen.

Lay Down The Rules

Setting boundaries for your child involves making a list of the rules of the home that everyone will follow. This will include everything from the things they are responsible for to being respectful to each other. Be specific when you work out the rules together, both parents working together to establish them. Once you both have come to an agreement on what the rules are, or the boundaries are, then you can work on fine-tuning them so that they are actionable.

For example, if the children are unwilling to share their toes, determine what the rules are for that infringement. In many cases, child behavior specialists believe that it is important to set boundaries that are able to be followed with punishments that fit the crime. Be fair with the rules. Everyone should receive the same type of punishment, warning and reward for the activities on the rules.

Here are some tips to be successful in establishing the boundaries for within your home:

• Determine what the rules are and write them down. Be sure that you sit down with your kids and allow them to express consider, interest or ask questions about the rules. Once everyone knows what the rules are, then you can begin to enforce them.

• The next step involves warnings. Giving one warning is an option for most parents, allowing their children to receive just one warning before inflicting punishment for the activity. Be sure that your child knows what the warning means. You may decide to go with no warnings or even more warnings, as you deem necessary for your children.

• When your child does not follow the rules, and has ignored any warnings you have given, the next step is to let your child know that they have broken the rules. Get down to eye level with the child, tell them what they have done wrong and send them to time out or the other type of punishment you have established.

In order for the process to work well for any family, the process must be the same throughout. For example, if you slack and give them more warnings then the system calls for, the result is that your children will continue to push the boundaries. When they do, you will continue to be frustrated with them.

Following through is not only something you should do with your children when it comes to punishments. In fact, not following through with the requirements of rewards will also cause a problem within your family unit. If you promise rewards of any type for good behavior, be sure to follow through. Children learn from their parents before anyone else which means that if you do not follow through they will not do so either.

In addition to this, setting boundaries for yourself is just as important. Your children will see you bickering or breaking the home’s rules and will do the same thing themselves. After all, if mommy or daddy can do it, why can’t they do it?

The benefits of setting boundaries and following through with them will resonate throughout the entire life. In most families, there is no reason for a parent that is a bully, but there is no doubt that your family also needs to follow fairly with the rules set forth.

For some children following any system is difficult. There may be emotional or developmental issues holding your child back. If you find that your child is continuing to pressure each other and setting boundaries is not helping, talk to your child’s doctor. They can give you guidance on if there may be a medical condition that could be interfering with their ability.


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TLC For Kids, Inc. has been St. Louis’ premier nanny and babysitting agency for over 30 years. TLC For Kids’ dedicated staff is ready to assist you in finding nannies, tutors, newborn care specialists, sitters and more in Atlanta, Charlotte, Chicago, Ft. Lauderdale, Jacksonville, Miami, Orlando, Palm Beach, Sarasota, St. Louis, Tampa and more!. Reach us at or 314-725-5660.